There are many ways to discipline children and guide their behaviour. When disciplining a child, it is important to match the discipline to:
- the age of the child
- the abilities of the child
- what the child has done
Have I tried:
- Setting reasonable and clear rules and limits: make sure the child understands what is expected and what will happen if s/he does not listen. Choose a few important rules - too many rules are difficult for the child to remember. Children can help decide rules and consequences.
- Reminding: tell the child the rules before s/he begins an activity, and if a problem begins to happen.
- Recognizing that a problem is beginning: fix the problem before it gets worse. Offer choices to the child.
- Redirecting: encourage the child to do something else.
- Ignoring: do not pay attention to behaviours that are bothersome, but not dangerous.
- Using humour: change uncooperative behaviour by making the child laugh and having fun doing what is asked.
- Distracting: focus the child’s attention on something else.
- Talking out feelings: help the child to say what s/he is feeling and accept his/her feelings.
- Problem-solving: suggest ways in which the child can handle the situation the next time. Older children can be encouraged to think of positive alternatives.
- Compromising: listen to the child’s point of view and try to come up with a solution that feels OK for both of you.
- Modeling: when you are with others behave the way you would like the child to behave.
- Allowing time to cool off: help the child to calm down, removing the child from others if necessary.
- Noticing positive behaviour: praise the child for showing the desired behaviour and for trying.
- Practicing patience: be aware that it takes time for the child to learn appropriate behaviours. Stay calm and do not overreact. You may have to calm yourself down if you are getting too angry and/or cannot control yourself.